My first week on my own 😊 … again πŸ˜…

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧑

I’m living alone …. again. All my 3 babyducks has moved out… again…and it’s seems that it’s going to be like this for a while now 😊. But I never know, I don’t know what next week or month will brings, but I assume that “this is it” now 😊.

My oldest son are living in the mountains and is very happy with his life. His friend has also moved back to the mountains, so my mammi- heart is a bit more relaxed now when I know it’s not just him and his dog, Zorro, alone “up there” fare away from people πŸ’™. My oldest son enjoy his work, and he/ they have also extended the contract of the home they are renting. So it looks like they’ll be living there for a while 🏑.

My son in the middle are living in Norway, and he is soon ready to finish the driving licence, and then he is “on the road on his own”, literally πŸš™. I think he really is going to enjoy to have his own driving licence 😊. He have also got permanent employment contract, and I’m very, very happy for him πŸ’™. So he is not going to be back in Spain for a while, except from hopefully for a holiday and two πŸ₯°. But when? I don’t know, I just know I miss him a lot, but as long as I know he is happy in his life, my mammi- heart is happy too πŸ’™.

And my daughter, she is enjoying her life in Malaga sourrende by her friends, living in an apartment she likes to live in, and she have a job she really enjoys and also an permanent employment contract 🧑. She is very good to “update” me about her life with sending me Snapchats, something I’m very grateful for 🧑.

And then it’s me 😊. Been on my own for a week (again). But it feels different this time, at least I think so? All my three children are happy in their life, something that makes me incredibly happy for them all ❀. But I’m not sure where in my life I’m at the moment πŸ€”. I’m fine, and I’m okay, and probably in it’s own way I’m in a way happy too, but I have been thinking a lot about “my life” this last week. But I have no “solutions” for my own life yet 😊. It takes a bit more then a week to find my “new” place in my life 😊. But of course I’m thinking a bit about the future, my future, and what and where and so on. But one day at the time 😊

I don’t feel lonesome, but I’m alone and I’m lonely, and that’s find. At the moment it’s my choice to have it like this. I need it 😊. At the same time I’m a little restless inside me without knowing why, and I’m not completely calm in my new life- situation yet ….. but it’s only been a week- I’m a little impatient.Β  I have to learn to be patient with myself 😊. But I feel like I’m in a “no – man’s country” at the moment 😳.

I’m not going to do a lots of changes in my life to fast, the different changes are coming “crawling” anyway 😊. And I don’t think there will bring me any good with to many changes to fast in my life either 😊.

My work- situation as a costumer service agent on the phone is not going to change for some months. Something I’m very happy for 😊. I got this message last week. A very nice surprise, and it makes it a bit easier for me to take “the turns” in my life I need to take a bit more in my own tempo. With that means, – I’m still going to work from my home for some more months and for the same department as well 😊. Phu! ,- I’m very happy I don’t need to do any changes there for a while 😊. I’m actually happy it’s not to many changes at the same time, to be honest 😊.

I know I need to create some new plans, routines and a kind of dynamic in my life, both daily, weekly and monthly. With good plans and routines it’s also a bit better to reach different goals 😊. It hasn’t been easy to “keep up” my plans “for running” in a stable way for a longer period when people moving in and out in my home,- but I think there will be a break from that for a while now, something that will hopefully and probably be easier for me to have plans and special be able to doing my plans for more then maybe 6 or 8 weeks at the time, and then have a 3 months “break” 😊.

I want to create a good plan for workout and exercises, and I want to have a better plan for my online freelance work too. I want to use time on painting, knitting and writing- do some better and more work in my blog, and I need to create my own study plan for language. But one step at the time 😊. And I want to have time to my family and friends as well. And I actually think I will manage “it all” as long as I’m not “rushing” “it all”, but give myself the time that I feel I need and is correct for me 😊.

And yes,- for some reason some of my friends really want me to start dating again 🀭. Some are trying to arrange different kinds of dates for me, but the thing is,- at the moment I’m not ready for any dating. Im actually not very interesting in dating now at days. It’s a bit more important for me to spend time to “meet this me” without the “mammi- me” just “the me”, then find/ meet a boyfriend at the moment 😊. I don’t miss a boyfriend or to be in a relationship now at days. A “friend with benefit” could be nice to have, but it is what it is at the moment, and it’s fine for me 😊. But of course I presage my friends good thoughts, I’m not just “there” in my life now 😊. When, or if, I’m ready for this dating thing again I can create a “position vacant/ available” in my blog instead and see how that goes πŸ€­πŸ˜….

It’s good to be alone, but it’s a bit silent in my home 😊. I miss my children, to just have them around me, but I don’t miss to be a “service station” for my kids, or to live together with them on permanent basis any more 😊. I like to have just my own mess, and I like to be able to just listen to my music, the music I like, and not just different music in the different floors 🎡🎢. It’s less clothes than needs to be washed, less dish wash and less mess, no socks in the sofa and I don’t need to nag, and I can be moody totally alone,- that’s good too 😊.

Anyway,- my first week alone has “contained” just me, my work as a costumer service agent, my freelance work, some necessary stuffs like shopping food, washing clothes and the dishes, eat, sleep- oh my- I have been so incredibly tired 😴,- and a lots of thinking 😊. I’m not able to share all of my thoughts with you yet, because I haven’t managed to “organize” them in a good and structured way in my head yet πŸ˜…,- they are at the moment just different thoughts “tumbling” a bit around up there on the top until they find their “places” 😊.

And I’m going to continue to share as best as I can in my blog about both my thoughts, my “new” life and other small and big “happenings” in my life 😊.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧑 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧑

See you soon 😊

Just me, – Laila, thinking a lot and trying to “sort” out my “new” life 😊

My first week “on my own” has been actually that,- on my own alone, doing my jobs, thinking a lot 😊. But I have no “solutions” for my own life yet 😊. It takes a bit more then a week to find my “new” place in my life 😊. But of course I’m thinking a bit about the future, my future, and what, how and where and so on. But one day at the time 😊

#gettingolder #menopause #midlife #lifeexperiences #changes #challenges #movingout #adventurer #lifeis #thefuture #growingup #grateful #changefocus #thougths #mychildren #mammi #justme #mylife #newlifesituation #positivefocus πŸ’š

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