Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡
Some of you have heard about “the empty nest syndrome”, and some not,- natural enough. Some of you have grown up children and maybe you’re have gone through “the empty nest syndrome” your self, and some have small children or not children at all, and haven’t been “there”, felt “the empty nest syndrome”.
I have just heard and read about “the empty nest syndrome” during the last years. But I know I had my first “meeting and experience” with the “syndrome” when my oldest son moved out from the home for around 10- 11 years ago. I just didn’t know that it was “the empty nest syndrome” I went through. I should really wish I had know- maybe and probably I had made some other choices in my life then 🤔.
“The empty nest syndrome” is actually not a kind of illness or disease, even it can feels like that for some parents. Special mams.
It’s more a term describing that the nest is empty, the kids are moved out. Furthermore, it is about insecurity, or a kind of feeling of loss that many parents can experience when their children grow up and move out of the nest / home. A kind of emptiness and sadness, a kind of grief.
One era in the life is over, and a new unknown, “unsure” and a bit scary era is in front of you. So many years has contained the child or the children. Raise them up, take care of them, following them up in different eras in their life,- like for example school and maybe various leisure activities.
And it’s many years you have been a parent, a mammi and daddy. At least 18 years of your life you have been a parent with a child in your home and life. In many cases actually more year then 18 years too, it depends how many children you have and how old your children are when they are moving out from the nest. And suddenly this life- situation changes- you are not “needed” in the same way anymore as a mammi or daddy.
Many, perhaps especially mothers, feel uncertain about what to fill their days with. Many people suddenly feel that they are standing there without a purpose anymore. The purpose has been to take care of the child / children, raise, support, take care of – and it has all changed shape, form, structure when the child and children moved out.
It is only natural to be sad when this part of life is over, and it is easy to look at this era in life as the end – and that is it too, a end of one era in life, at the same time the beginning of something new. And hopefully something exciting too.
It is only natural to be sad when life changes, and it is only natural to feel that those changes also feel very challenging.
Fortunately, this grief, this feeling of having lost something, the feeling of loneliness and emptiness is a temporary feeling, for most parents. But it is a deep and difficult feeling to feel while “on” for a while. And it is important to take the time to feel these feelings, spend time learning to deal with them, spend time adjusting to the new life. And the older you get, the less you can tolerate and cope with different transitions and changes at once too.
It is not always and in all situations it is accepted to feel sad, and unfortunately “the empty nest syndrome” is one of these situations. But it is perfectly fine to be allowed to feel sad, and to cry. And it can be good to talk to someone about these feelings and thoughts that arise when going through “the empty nest syndrome”.
It’s just not so easy to talk about them to “all and everyone”, but maybe with someone who are going through the same, or have been through “the empty nest syndrome”.
On top of “the empty nest syndrome” also the menopause has a bad habit to “show up” in a woman’s life in this stadium of life. And it can be a bit much to handle emotional now and then- something that’s fine, and hard and difficult as well.
Some women prefer to be alone, use time to “feel and think” through what they are going through. Other prefer to handle “the empty nest syndrome”, as well as menopause differently.
What’s correct for one is not sure it’s correct for someone else- and that’s fine, that’s okay. We have all different ways to handle the different experiences and challenges in our life.
That the children grow up and out of the nest also does something with one’s identity. What to do know? What to fell the days, the time with? Who am I know when Im not a daily mammi or daddy anymore? One can even feel useless, and not quite know what to do with the days, time, life. Some get pets, others new interests and hobbies.
We are different and handle “the empty nest syndrome ” differently. In my next post I will share some of my own thoughts, experiences and feelings about “the empty nest syndrome”. Even my daughter moved back to “the nest” Autumn 2021 I do feel and have felt and will also go through more about and around “the empty nest syndrome”. And I know I’m not the only mammi that’s “goes” through this kind of changes, challenges and experiences during this period in the life. But it’s not always so easy to explain “it” for “all and everyone”.
I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡
See you soon 😊
“The empty nest syndrome” is not a illness or a disease. It’s more a term describing that the nest is empty, the kids are moved out, and the different feelings, emotions and thoughts that’s “shows up” when the nest is empty 🐣. We all handle “the empty nest syndrome” differently, at the same time as many parents goes through it on one or another way 🧡.
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