I’m not currently dating,- and it’s my choice 🌹

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

I’m not currently dating, and it’s a time since I actually did date, and also was “looking” for a date. And I’m very fine with that. I actually don’t miss dating or being in a relationship. Because in my mind I do understand the “dating- concept” as you meet up with someone because you want, and hopefully will get a serious relationship together with this person. Both are interested in each other,- that’s why it is a date. It’s not sure this “understaning” is correct. It’s just the way I understand the “dating- concept”.

But I need to admit that for a period I actually thought that I miss dating, miss being in a relationship, and missed a boyfriend in my life. But the truth is I did miss an imagination, and not my reality when it comes to relationships. But my imagination over how a relationship can or should be.

I deleted the dating app Tinder in October/ November 2019, and haven’t regret that so fare. But I was “tired” of the “dating” before I deleted the app. It didn’t gave me very much, to be honest. Like relationships haven’t given me to much either. To be fair,- it’s my last “long term- serious” relationship that’s “freshest” in my mind, and also where many of my not to good experiences when it comes to relationships are “build on”. Natural enough, but also maybe unfortunately?

And it’s actually more the 7 years since that relationship ended- something I’m very grateful for 🙏, but still it has “marked” my mind and soul in a bit negative direction and with a bit negative thoughts and experiences when it comes to dating and relationship.

I have met some nice dates during the lasts years, but also some strange dates. But that’s not the reason why I have made a choice and decision to not date for a while.

Dating didn’t gave me very much, or to use the dating app and “try” to find a date, a date that’s also maybe would became to a serious relationship after a while.

Maybe I’m not a “nettdating- person”? Maybe I need to met a man in “the real life” and not during a “switch left or right” app? I know it’s different dating- app’s, not just like the way Tinder is in “function”. But still I don’t think nettdating is something for me.

It’s not just that I’m not a “nettdating- person” that made me choose to not date for a while, but also because I know I need to resett my self when it comes to dating and relationship. Really resett my self. Maybe I manage to do it, maybe not. I don’t know, I don’t even know if I’m going out there in the “dating and relationship” world again either. And it’s fine. I’m fine with that.

I have thought a bit over why I wanted to date at that time I was a bit “busy” with that. And for me it was about attention, be attracted and became attracted of, intimacy and sex, hopefully feel “close” to an other man both mentally as well as psychic, meet someone to share different things and stuffs in life together with, someone to have different experiences together with as well as do things and stuffs together with, feel “connected” together with, someone “special” and be “special” for, feel butterflies in my stomach and some extra heartbeats too, just because of that man and the feelings I had for him, to feel important for someone, to miss someone as well as be missed, and probably a bit more I don’t remember anyone and at the moment 😊.

But the reality, my reality is that I haven’t actually very much real experiences from this, this thoughts about how I think a relationship is “in function”. My own experiences when it comes to, special relationships, are not like my “dreams and imaginations”, if I can call it that. Because my dreams and imagination about a relationship is “my why” I wanted to date and be in a relationship, but the truth is, my truth and my experiences and my reality is not very similar with my imagination.

My experiences from a relationship are actually something I don’t want to go through again. And we date because we want to meet someone that’s makes us feel “comfortable”, feel happy and happiness, joy and love and so on. We in general dates because of “my why” I wanted to date.

So I made a decision for more then over 1,5 years ago that I don’t want to date. I don’t want to date before all of me, my heart, my mind, my soul are ready for dating and ready for the commitments and the responsibility a relationship has. I need to really resett my mind, my heart and my soul first. And I have no idea how long time my “resett- process” will take. Maybe “forever”? I don’t know, and that’s fine 😊.

And it’s actually a good feeling to say “Thank you, but No Thank you, I’m not dating at the moment”, when someone asks me out for a ice tea or a coffee, a glass of wine or a lunch. And in general I don’t even get the question “why not”, and to be honest, it’s actually no one’s “business” either why I don’t date. It’s my choice, and I’m very fine and comfortable with my choice too 😊. And I’m very relaxed with my choice as well, when it comes to this “currently not dating” 😊. And I’m actually not even sure it’s worth it, – the dating and relationship,- to expose myself to maybe get the same experiences again when it comes to relationships.

Like I have mention before,- when or if I’m want to date again and want a serious relationship I can but out an “vaccination available” in my blog 😅. We see what’s happen there in the future 😊.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡. Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

My imagination about how a relationship should be and my reality about how a relationship is,- is two very different things 🥀.

My imagination about how a relationship should be and my reality about how a relationship is,- is two very different things 🥀. So that’s why I have chosen to not date for awhile,- I need to resett my self, my mind, my soul, my heart before I maybe start dating again 😊. And I’m very relaxed with my decision about not dating 😊.

#dating #relationship #relaxed #decision #mychoice #resettmyself #experiences #differences #imagenation #thougths #feelings #choices

Where does the road go in my life now? 🛤💚

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

Like I mention in my last post,- I’m standing on the start line into a new era in my life. At the moment I’m standing and I choose to stand for a tiny little while too, because I just need to do this for myself. I need to feel on my feelings before I start “moving” in one or another direction in my life.

In one way I have some of the same thoughts I had when I was a teenager and was standing on the start line to be a young adult. What to do? Where to go? What can I expect? How do I do this? What do I want? Where do I want “go”? How to “get there”? What will happen there in the future? And so on. Maybe you recognize some of my thoughts from when you was a teenager and on the start line into the young adult life too? 🤔

To be honest,- I think I’m thinking a bit more about this different questions now then I actually did when I was a teenager and on my way to the young adult life. When I was a on my way to be a young adult I lived a bit more in the moment then I’m doing now. And I was also a bit more “what happens happens, it will probably be fun anyway” 😊.

I still think I have a very exciting time in front of me, and I still think I will meet on a lots of joy, fun and happiness,- but I’m probably a bit more conscious of my thoughts, my feelings, and hopefully my choices further too, – than for for example around 30 years ago 😊.

Will I continue be living in Spain? Work as an customer service agent, private teacher and freelance writer? 🎧📝 I have two of my three children here in Spain. At least at the moment,- but I don’t know what they’re plans will be in the future.

Or am I going to move back to Norway? Try to find a job as a teacher or maybe work in the home- nursery or at nursery home? 📚💉 I have one child in Norway, and I really do miss him, at the same time he is living his own life, and I’m not going to be the same part in his life as I was just some few years ago.

Or maybe I’m going to get the opportunity to move to California and squeeze some grapes into wine? 🍇🍷 Or maybe Ireland and visit the leprechaun 🧚‍♂️?

At the moment I don’t know what or where,- and at the moment I actually can’t take any choices either. At the moment I’m in a bit “emotional place” in my life and then it’s not the correct time to make to many and to big choices, elections and decisions in my life and for my future.

What I do know is that I’m going to live in the home I’m living in for a time now. I’m not ready to move anywhere at the moment,- and one of the reasons for that is because it has already been a bit moving in and out from this home during the last 18 months, – even it’s not me that has moved in and out 😊. I just need to have a tiny while of not to much moving “here and there”, just in way to “calm down” 😊.

But I’m actually not sure if I want to continue living in Spain or work as a costumer service agent “for ever”. Or as a private teacher either. But I’m not very tempted to move back to Norway either and work as a teacher or in the home- nursery up there in the North.

At the moment I feel I’m finish with being a teacher and to work in the home nursery, and also as a costumer service agent. But don’t we all have that now and then where you are a bit tired of your job?

And of course,- I’m also a bit “touched” with some emotional feelings because I’m standing on a finish line for one era in my life, as well as a starting line into a new era in my life 😊. So I’m probably not in “the best place” in my life to make any big decisions at the moment either 😊.

I know when we are turning the page on the calendar to August I’m finish working for the department I’m working in. It’s closing down in Norway. But I also know that the company I’m working for have an obligation to try to find an other job to me in the company as long as I have been an employer for more than 6 months,- something I have. But at the same time,- we are living in a corona- situation,- so it’s difficult to tell to much about the future too. I’m can assume what’s in front me until August, but after August I actually have no idea at the moment.

At the moment I have just decided to not do to much of anything, not make to many work- or moving plans or decisions, – just do my work where I’m working, be a private teacher and do my online freelance work, and live in the home I’m living in. Then I see what’s coming up, or what’s happen. I don’t know,- I don’t know if “the road” in the future will be in Spain or Norway or California or maybe another place.

What I do know is that I actually like to work with creative things, and people too,- and I like to see progression in my work too. But my weakness, or strength, is to create, be creative and see a result of my job.  A product.  My dream is really to be able to feed myself on something I make, write, create, paint – or even “squeeze” some grapes into wine? But is something of this actually possible, special because we are living in a corona- situation?

When that’s said,- of course I have seen a lots of great positive progressions in both my work as a teacher as well as in the home nursery 😊. But it’s a different kind of progression.

I want and I like to create, own a product, is a (physical) result of what I do, what I work with.  (ex- paint, knit, write, maybe make wine). But it possible to work and live from something like that? I don’t know.

I do not know what my future will bring me, – but something that contains both joy, happiness and probably a bit new knowledge as well as wisdom, and some changes too.

At the moment I take one tiny step at the time, one from an era that’s over and one into an era that’s started 💚. I need to find my balance in my life before I take to many decisions about my future 😊.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

I’m just going to take one step at the time – one from an era in my life that’s over, and one into the new era in my life 😊.

I don’t know what to future will bring me,- and I don’t know what kind of changes, choices or directions I’m going to do or take 😊. At the moment I just take one step from an era in my life that’s over, and one step at the time into a new era in my life 💚

#changes #directions #choices #lifeis #livinginspain #Norwegian #era #gettingolder #menopause #midlife #erainlife #me #future #questions #thelife #thougths #reflections #positivefocus 💚

I choose to wait a bit to greet the Irish leprechaun 🧚‍♂️😊

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

Most countries have folk tales and legends, and also their own trolls, elves and various mysterious creatures of various kinds. Also Ireland 🧚‍♂️.

In Ireland they have this tiny little man, he is actually not more then around 75 cm high and looks like a man at the same time a bit like troll. He is called a leprechaun, and I have actually been writing some small articles about him now and then when a client has requested it. So in many ways I have “encountered” a leprechaun and two in my own texts and through research.

A leprechaun is neither evil nor good, but a little prankster who can just as easily trick you a little as to help you.

He comes from a mysterious land, perhaps a land under the sea, and often his job is a shoemaker.  It is said that he is quite rich, and has a pot full of gold coins at the end of the rainbow.  But it is not so easy to meet a leprechaun, because he likes it best at dawn or at dusk.  A leprechaun is nice, welcoming and hospitable, it is said.  And if you are lucky enough to meet him then he is required to tell you where the gold is, and maybe he will give you a wallet of money that never runs out.

I do like this little mystery man, at least what I do know about him during textes and research. And in my mind I think that the people in Ireland are maybe a bit like an leprechaun? Nice, welcoming and hospitable, and also a good helper with a touch of humor? At kesdt the people I actually have met from Ireland are like this 😊.

Last week I got a job offer from Ireland/ Cork, with the possibility for maybe meeting a leprechaun- if I choose to take the job and move to Ireland. Not because the job is about leprechaun, but because the job is in Ireland 😅. And the salary was quite okay too, for me it’s seems like a tiny little pot of gold coins. Well,- not quite, but a salary a bit better and more then I have at the moment, that’s for sure.

The job offer sounds, to be honest, incredibly interesting. It’s about healthcare and medicine, but I need to move to Ireland. And I’m not sure how ready I’m for moving to another country during an pandemi.

It’s feels actually challenges enough to live in Spain during an pandemi, so how will it be to move to another country where I don’t know anyone, and also need to work in a home office because of the pandemi? And where there’s even higher red corona- numbers then here in Spain?

I don’t think my daughter is quite ready to let me move to fare away from her yet either. But little by little and step by step she will soon live on her own again, and the situation will be different.

And I have also something else I feel I need to find out a tiny bit about before I maybe choose to leave Spain one day,- and that is actually something with a man. It’s difficult to explain, because I’m not quite sure what I feel, think or believe anymore when it comes to relationship, and this boyfriend/ girlfriend- thing. I’m actually not sure if I want to be in, or have any relationship again. Or even believe in relationship anymore. I’m not sure if it’s worth it,- but still I’m a bit curious about this man for reasons I can’t explain at the moment.

Not the best reason for not take this job offe in Ireland, but yes, I need to admit I actually want to try to find out why I have this man on my mind now and then. (…okay, maybe he is a bit more on my mind then now and then 😊).

TBut still the main reason why I didn’t took this job offer in Ireland this time is the pandemi and all the different challenges and restrictions that are following the pandemi and are around this situation, and also my children, my daughter. I can’t move away from her yet.

At the same time I need to admit that if things had been different, if there hasn’t been any pandemi and I knew my daughter was ready, I have probably said yes to this job offer and moved to Ireland. I don’t think the choice has been very difficult. Because the job sounds very interesting, and the salary was not to bad either, and a fare as I know, Ireland, under normal circumstances, can be very interesting to live in and explore 😊.

Free shiping over 69$

I should really wish I could do the job from Spain,- but unfortunately I can’t. And that’s the way it is at the moment. That’s a part of the life, that’s life.

Anyway,- I’m very happy and grateful for get this job offer, even I didn’t say yes,- and maybe one day in the future, when the pandemi is over and things are a bit more “calm down”,- who knows,- maybe I move to Ireland and meet the leprechaun? And also maybe do some exacting and interesting work as well😊 ? With a pot of gold coins as my salary? I don’t know, but it is nothing wrong to have some dreams 😊.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡. Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

I didn’t have any “real” leprechaun in my home,- this are the closest ones I will come a leprechaun for awhile and his tiny pot of gold coins in the end of the rainbow at the moment 🧚‍♂️😊

It’s not the easiest time for some moving to a new and other country now at days, not even when a interesting job offer drops up during an pandemi 📝,- and maybe even the possibility for meeting a nice and polite leprechaun 🧚‍♂️. So I choose to wait a bit, and continue my life in Spain for a while 😊.

#joboffer #workfromhome #culture #fairytale #history #traditions #ireland #leprechaun #family #choices #changes #challenges #coronavirus #restrictions #pandemi #lifeis #possibility #positivefocus 💚