Midlife crisis and job opportunities? 🤔📝🎧

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

Both men and women goes through menopause,- but differently. And both can also deal with a kind of midlife crisis too, but also differently. And it’s not all and everyone that have a midlife crisis when they go through menopause. Some have midlife problems, issues and thoughts instead.

I’m probably there in that “area” where I have different thoughts about my life, my midlife. I don’t feel I have any kind of personal crisis . I think I had my personal or life crisis from I was around 39/ 40 years old, and probably until a year ago. Because it was long before menopause, my personal crisis was. I think the best word for what I went through during those years is a personal or life crisis, not midlife crisis. At least it felt like that for me. Like a personal crisis, like a stone in my stomach and a claw in my heart and soul. Not constantly, but very often. Closely every day. And of course that’s also exhausting.

A very short summary and version of my personal / life crisis: My economy was to just cry of, something I also did now and then too. I was in a very bad relationship for me, lucky that one actually ended, but not because I manage to end it. I was to confused and had to little believe in my self at that point to end it. I think the desteny took care of that for me, to help me “out” from something I was “blocked” into.

I was in a new country. I was so unsure and had so little confidence and believe in my self. Our Prairie in Norway was “long gone”. I didn’t have any money to move back to Norway even if I wanted too, and I didn’t knew what I wanted to work with either, and felt very miserable in my teaching job in Norway ( not because of the job, because of my life), and later my customer service agent on the phone job in Spain (it’s not the same job/ product I’m working with now). But I needed the salary so badly. And in a way I also did “lost” someone close to me in Norway during this time. Something I did struggle with for many years- and now and then I still feel on pain, but I have more accepted the situation.

It took me closely 10 years to get distance, to accept the situation as well as be able to find myself again, the person I did like before I met this man in Norway that in his own way “created” me to a person I didn’t like, didn’t knew and was to uncomfortable in the situation to be able to do something with it.

Now I’m not there anymore,- slowly, very slowly during the last 10 years I’m in an other inner place in my mind and soul,- special when it comes to my self and my own comfortably with my self, and the believe and trust in my self.

When this personal crisis, or life crisis, if you will, finally let go, I felt free inside me. A very reliving feeling.

So I don’t feel on any kind of midlife crisis now at days- I think that one is over for me, but I have some midlife thoughts. And most of them are about my future, my job, where to live. (Nope,- still no boyfriend thoughts about my future- 😅) What to do when I’m going to continue now? And I don’t know yet,- to be honest, and I think it will take a bit of time before I know, but hopefully not 10 years this time 😅🤞🙏.

At the moment I have a okay job as customer service agent on the phone and the online freelance job. The costumer service agent on the phone job is stable, the salary is stable and my working hours are stable too. I’m also working from my home,- something I prefer, and the tasks and costumers are not to bad at all. But do I want to work as a costumer service agent on the phone for the rest of my life? I don’t know. There’s no possibility to “grow” in the job or get knew knowledge, or new working challenges. It is what it is,- a costumer service agent job on the phone,- nothing more and nothing less.

And then it is this pension. I’m not getting any younger. And how will the pension question be for me if I’m moving to another country and starting working there? In Norway I know how it is as well as here in Spain,- but in Norway I’m going to have big economic challenges- and how will I manage to go through something like that again? And like I mention,- I’m not getting any younger.

And because I’m not getting any younger I’m also more and more invisible in the work market. Not so attractive at all. In Norway I could probably get a job in a store for the same company I’m working as a costumer service agent on the phone. And that’s okay,- but again- my economy in Norway is at this point a very lost case. So at the point to move to Norway for me will be challenging, special because of my Norwegian economic situation. ( something I can “thank” the stupid, stupid ex boyfriend in Norway for). But yes,- I do still actually consider Norway as a potential to stay “for the rest of my life”. But I need to find a couple more “solutions” on that one, that’s for sure.

Can I move back to the place in Norway where I’m actually born in and from? Or will I be lonely there?

I have also considered Ireland and Canada as well, or just continue stay in Spain. But Canada is very fare away,- so I think I let that one “go”. Ireland? I need to do more research then. Or just stay in Spain, have and do my job and,- until I die one day? Because that’s what’s going to happen to the end,- but what will I do in the meantime? What will I fill my life up with before I’m 101 years old?

Of course my dream is to be able to have my paintings as my main job,- and I do try to find a way to manage that. But as we all know,- a job as a artist is in general not a very good income economic job. It’s hard, hard work to manage success and also survive economic. And maybe even harder for me because of my age.

So at the moment and probably some years forward I’m going to be thinking about this,- my job, economy, where to live and be old. And how to live inbetween. And try to find a solution that suits me.

I’m also of course thinking about my children. I have one son in Norway, one son in Spain and a daughter in Bali. I want to live a place where it’s easy for me to be able to see and meet all three of them as much as possible. And then I’m thinking as least it will be possible to travel and visit them now and then during a year. I don’t think Canada is the best solution for that,- that’s for sure 😊.

I’m very happy and grateful for my living situation and the home I’m living in now. I enjoy to stay here, and I think I can stay here for a while too, if I understood Natasja correctly? But that’s also something that can’t last “forever”, one day I need to move out,- and I don’t like to move and move and move,- so after a while I need to find a home I can stay in for a long, long time. Hopefully to the day my children are sending me to the sky.

So no,- I’m not in any midlife crisis, but I do think a lot about what I want and where to go in my future. The good thing is,- I’m not stressing about to find a solution for it “all” now,- but hopefully I have some solutions when I’m maybe at age 55? (I have some few years to think and find a solution and two,- – I’m still “just” 49 😊).

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

What to do? Work as a costumer service agent on the phone for the rest of my life?🎧 Or be creative and do something I really enjoy to do,- paint?🎨 (the photo is like this on purpose 😅)

I’m not in a midlife crisis, even the menopause is “knocking on my door”. I think I went through my kind of personal crisis instead in a period for closely 10 years 😳. But I have some midlife thoughts, and I do think a bit about them. Actually a lot. Norway? Spain? Costumer service agent job on the phone? Or maybe painting? Or something else, somewhere else? I don’t know yet.

#midlife #midlifecrise #midlifethoughts #changes #challenges #work #workingsituation #thougths #feelings #choices #menopause #mylife #gettingolder

Menopause,- “the new Spring in life” ? 😳😅

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

I did read somewhere that menopause was like “the new Spring in life”,- but I’m not so sure about that one yet 😳. Sometimes it feels a bit more like a cold winter storm, to be honest ❄. But just sometimes 😊. In general I’m still fine during this new “process” in my life, and body. But I don’t know how this menopause process later will be for me.

Menopause,- the new Spring in life? 🌱 I don’t know about that,- but things are changing like the Spring changes the nature from the cold winter time ❄. So maybe it’s something in it?

Some women are open about and talk about menopause, others do not say very much, and some even “deny” that they are there or have been there.  Why this is so I’m not sure.  Shame about getting older?  Fear of a new and unknown phase in life?  Or too big challenges in this phase for them to be able to talk about menopause? Probably a bit of it all.

We women don’t experiences menopause in the same way. Like we didn’t have the same experiences during the puberty. Some women can have a very hard menopause, and other more “sails” through it.

I did start to “research” about menopause before I was in the menopause, and I’m still not “in the menopause” yet, at the same time as I know this phase in life starts a bit before it has been a year since the last period. I wanted to know a bit about this new phase and period in my life, and what I could “expect” as well, as also maybe get some advice how to handle different kinds of challenges if they get to hard. Be a bit prepared for this new changes as well as challenges.

Menopause is in a way “official” when it has been more then one year since the last period, but it start some years before that. And it last some years after that too.

Like I mention, I’m still not “official” in menopause, but in a phase which in the technical language is called pre- perimenopause , but of course I notice different changes both in my body and mind.

I’m not ashamed over getting older, but if I like it? To be honest,- I’m not sure. It’s like I haven’t had the time to think or fell to much about it/ this yet,- if I like it or not, because so fare in this “period” in my life I haven’t been to much alone and be able to think or feel to much about this “new life experience” I’m going to go through.

As you know my children have been moving in and out during the last two- three years. And that’s a part I feel I’m very finish with,- live together with my children, or anyone else. My children can be my neighbours instead 😊. That I would actually loved 🥰.

I not worried to talk about menopause either, at the same time there’s “things” that’s happens in my mind I can’t explain very well. Special this “moody and emotional moments”. What I do know is that I need to be and live alone now so I can “sort” this out, find my own way to “deal” with “this”, handle it and learn to live with it- this “getting older and the different changes”, and now and then, challenges too.

I can’t at this point say I feel I’m going through a new Spring in my life 😅🌱,- but I can understand why some call menopause and the time after for a new Spring in life. Maybe special the time after, when this suddenly mood and emotion storms are a bit more “calm down”, and you in your own way have found “the new way” in life?

I know some feel and thinks their life is “over” when they go through menopause. And some also goes through a kind of “middle life crisis” during this process.

One part or epoch in life is over,- what will the next one brings? What should I do now? For many the children also are moving out during this period in life, and they feel a kind of “useless”, the empty nest syndrome are in a way “knocking on the door”. I need to admit I really like to live alone, so the empty nest syndrome haven’t knocking on my door 😊. Well at least the time I have tried to live alone so fare 😅. Let me put it this way,- I liked it so much to live alone I want to try it for a bit longer period then 2- 3 months 😊. I miss my children, I love my children, I enjoy spending time together with them- but I’m very finish to live together with them. And I’m not ashamed over being that, or feel like that- like I mention in an other post,- it’s feels like my freedom to be able to live alone now 💛.

An other thing during this “getting older” ,- you can get this feeling of being not very “attractive” any more. Maybe special when it comes to the work situation, and maybe also when it comes to dating?

In general I don’t think to much that my life is over because I’m getting older, I’m in my life and very happy and grateful for that 🧡. I’m fine with the fact that my children are out of the nest, and I’m fine in my job. I’m not stressing with this dating either. I have some others thing I want to try to do and “find out” before I’m going to date again,- and it’s not even sure I want to date again, or have a boyfriend. My experience when it comes to dating, men and relationships is that there are a lot of hassles, whining, nagging and unfavorable requirements from men/ boyfriend. I want to have peace in my life, and not hassles, whining, nagging and unfavourable requirements.

But,– when those emotional waves are coming, just running and rumbling through my soul, thoughts and mind I’m not so comfortable in my life. I can get a bit “bunch” of negative thoughts and feelings about closely “all and everything” to be honest. But still actually not about relationship, dating or men. My negative thoughts goes more to “what am I going to do with my life?” Move to a new place? Back to Norway? To another country? What about work? Do I want to work as a costumer service agent on the phone for the rest of my life? And in my mind “the rest of my life” are a couple of years to be honest. And I also struggling with thoughts that I have been not the best mammi for my children. So this are mainly my negative waves, or “boble”. Sounds maybe like a nice and “easy” boble- but it’s not. I’m very “phu hu poor me” when this “waves” are “dropping by”.

And yes,- there’s one more emotional wave,- this tears that’s dropping up sometimes from no where. And the fuse that has become even shorter than it was before.  Things that have not annoyed me that much before can be incredibly annoying now.

But still in general I feel more and less like me. Without to many challenges, or “emotional waves” 🌊. But the thing is,- I’m not prepared for this “waves” when they “drops by”. I have actually no idea when they are dropping by 😳 They don’t give to many “hands up” or “warnings” like “we are going to mess a bit with your mind today” before they in a way are just “rolling over” me 😳.

Lucky for me they don’t last to long,- a day or two, and then I have some days, maybe even a couple of weeks without. But when they are “tumbling and rumbling” in my body- I really don’t feel I’m going through a new Spring in life- that’s for sure. And an other thing,- I really prefer to be alone during those “emotional waves moments” .

Unfortunately people in general doesn’t understand this, this “suddenly waves”, this need to be alone, be able to find your own way to handle them. The exception is, someone who actually are going through the same, or have bee thought menopause. They understand very well. Because it’s just not to “put your self together”. It’s actually not so easy. Not with this.

So yes,- I do really understand why some women in the 50’s, during this menopause, are a bit “trolly”. I’m a bit “trolly” my self,- even I don’t want to be “trolly”.

And I do understand this “colour up” with makeup and nail polish, clothes and accessories,- we don’t want to feel useless or invisible,- special not in work situations, and I can also understand the dating situation too,- even I’m not there.

We are some women with a lots of knowledge, in general even a good working moral,- something I can’t say many younger have. And,- we have so much to offer. Maybe I should write a bit more about my thoughts about the work situation and this feeling of being invisible in different work situations when you have turned 45 and on top of that is a woman in another post? Because I have some thoughts about that too,- more then I hade before 😊.

Anyway,- the new Spring in life? Yes in one way I can see and understand the “metaphor”, in other ways not at all. I think it depends where you are in the menopause as well as how “hard” and challeng the menopause is. This can, natural enough, be various from woman to woman 🧡. It’s can feel like a bit chaotic Spring now and then 😊😳😊

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

The new Spring in life? Something happens, some changes, with both the mind and body during menopause,- and it could be like a kind of Spring?

I did read somewhere that menopause was like the “new Spring” in life. In one way I can understand the “metaphor”. But sometimes I need to admit that it feels like a very ” cold and stormy” Spring 😳😅🌱.

#midlife #lifeexperiences #changes #challenges #menopause #mentalhealth #emotions #feelings #thougths #outifthenest #gettingolder #growingup #newspringinlife #lifeis #midlifecrise

Mid age and midlife crisis 🥀

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

The midlife crisis is no joke.  It can be a pretty tough mental process for many, especially men.  Unfortunately, it turns out that there is a fairly high suicide rate among men who are going through the midlife crisis.  And the average age, worldwide, is 47, 2 years. 

Unfortunately it’s in general men, all over the world, that’s struggling most during this “status in the life period” in life. But of course women too, but maybe in a different way? And it is not “all and everyone” that goes through a mental crisis in the mid age either.

Often is the reason why some feel the mid age are so hard are feelings like unsuccessful, hopelessness over different dreams that hasn’t come through, wishes that’s feels not fulfilled and they are in the middle of the life,- and get a feeling that the life is over. But the middle of the life is not the end. It is the middle of the life. At the same time I can understand this painful feelings inside many fells during this period in life.

Why do so many feel on this bad feelings and thoughts, and also some choose suicide as a “resort” and “solution”? I don’t know, I don’t have the answers, but I can actually really understand this feeling of unsuccessful in life. The hopelessness when dreams and wishes feels like they are not fulfilled, and the feeling of lost youth, and  thoughts  about  a frightening and unknown old age can scares “anyone”, the feeling of not reaching, lack of happiness, depression, emptiness, a feeling of not reaching, and whether one has children – the children who move out, and a home that feels empty. It can be a lots to process at the same time,- as well as there often also are a economic and money “issue”. The economy is not in the direction that is was wishes for in this age.

It’s a kind of feeling that the life is over, and it’s not possible to reach any dreams, wishes and goals anymore, or have any hopes. But it is 😊. Just think about what you actually have manage to do during your 45- 50 years of living? Then it should be possible to “squeeze” in a bit more during the at least next 30- 40 years of your life? Maybe in a bit slower tempo,- but so? 😊

I think I have had my “midlife crisis” in my life, already. This crisis where you actually think you can’t manage anymore, not a tiny little challenge more, at the same time as you feel failed in the economic and material field.  This, unfortunately, is one of the reasons why many, special men choose suicide as a solution instead of the feeling of unsuccessful.

I’m not a man,-, but when I was around 39- 40 I was in “this place” in my life. This incredible painful feeling of being unsuccessful in so many area in my life. It felt more heavy that I could manage. I even planned how and where to do it,- three different times. To try to end this   incredible painful feeling inside me.

The reason why I didn’t manage it was the thoughts of my children. I couldn’t just leave them either, in away alone in the world, and I also knew that my children would never understood why I had left them like that, because of economy, money and material issues. The incredibly painful feeling of unsuccessful. But it was hard, and I can really understand this feeling of being unsuccessful and actually not be able to “see the light in the tunnel”. But “the light  is there”, I know it’s there. So fight as best as you can during  this  hard part of the midlife crisis 💛.

So yes, I know. I know how it feels to not manage life anymore. To not see solutions. To feel useless and unsuccessful. To feel not worthy a shit. But,- still, – I can now say,- life feels good, – even with “the baggage” I have,- but now I slowly try to let go, step by step, trying to leave one heavy part down in the road and let it be there.

Hopefully that was my midlife crisis, and hopefully I will not be in that place in my life again. I actually don’t think so,- I will be in a place like that again,- but I can’t know.

I’m still not successful in the general term of success and successfulness, and m not rich on material things or have a lots of money in my bank account, – but it doesn’t matter anymore 😊. I’m fine,- I have what I need and still do my best to reach my different goals, wishes and dreams in my life. And I know I work hard to keep it going.

I can also imagine that to be in the midlife crisis during an pandemi must be even harder than without an pandemi. So many people has lost their homes, jobs, safety net and different things in life that’s in a way did defined their successes in their life.

I think it’s difficult to have dreams, wishes and goals to work for now at days,- and now and then I’m also “losing” it a bit,- but I try my best to focus on the positive things and try my best to keep the hope alive inside me 😊.

An other part of the midlife crisis is for many women when their children are moving out, and the home feels incredibly empty, silent and the “mammi routines” aren’t there anymore. It’s like “What to do now?”🤔

I don’t have unfortunately, any wise advice to give when someone are goes through a heavy midlife crisis and struggling with keeping things, lifes, their self together, in on or another way. I’m very sorry for that. The only advice I have is,- don’t give up. Look for the small, nice and positive things in a day. It doesn’t need to be so much,- but if you sample the small things they will be much together 💛. And life is always changing, it’s ups and downs, and I know some downs can be pretty hard too 😔. But after a down, there will come an ups,- if not the downs hasn’t been there. I know it’s not easy, I really know that- but it’s worth to at least try and give yourself some time too. It takes time to get out of the cold dark midlife crisis. But it’s possible 😊.

Like I mention earlier in my text,- I’m thinking about what I actually have manage to “squeezed” into my 48 years long life so fare. And it’s actually a bit 😊. Then I think I will probably manage to “squeeze” in a bit more,- even I at the moment are not sure what I want to “squeeze” in. But I will find that if I give myself a bit of time 😊.

Some will also probably think I’m not successful in life,- but in my life I’m in my own way successful, – so that’s fine and good enough for me 😊. It’s my life, and it’s me that needs to be and feel successful in my life,- I don’t need to be that for someone else 😊.

It was actually a bit difficult to explain and write about the midlife crisis, but I hope you got “the essence” of what I wanted to write about and tell? 🥀

I know midlife crisis can be challenging, and I haven’t the best solutions for how to “survive” it,- my best advice is to talk with someone, get some help to sort out your feelings and thoughts,- because you are actually not alone at all to go through a midlife crisis 🧡.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

Roses from my patio- a kind of reminder that I’m in a new flowering in my life- and not like a “fallen” flower eith mo future anymore 🌹

Many people all around the world goes through a midlife crisis, and it can be a pretty hard personal crisis too for some 😔. I have been there my self,- some years ago. But now I choose to look at this new period in my life as a new flowering in my life 🌹.

#gettingolder #menopause #midlife #lifeexperiences #changes #challenges #midlifecrise #hardtime #solutions #hope #optimism #lifeis #thelife #experiences #differences #midage #newflowringinlife 🌹