It takes a bit time to find the balance again 😊🥀

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

I have been living with some “moving in and out” from my home since the beginning of October 2019. And during this time I have found out it takes a bit time to find my balance in the new “living together” and “living alone” situations that has changed more and less every second or third month 😊.

Things goes okay, of course, but I need to try to find a kind of rhythm, routines and balance together with the people I’m living together with as well as my own rhythm, routines and balance when they has moved out again 😊.

The first month it’s a bit like trying out what’s most functional for the people who are living in my home as well as me. And then slowly during the second month it’s seems and feels like we get a kind of balance together, and things in the daily life goes a bit “smoother” and we in a way manage to create a kind of routine together as well as separate.

And then we turn into the third month and a new “round” of trying to find the balance starting again because someone has moved out, and someone is maybe soon moving in again 😊.

It’s almost a bit like I have to reset myself a little bit every time – whether it’s moving in or moving out.  If you understand what I mean?

In a living together situation it’s a bit important to find a balance more and less where everyone is a bit comfortable with. But it is not easy, because we are all different, we have different habits (good and not to good), and we see things in the daily life differently too.

I need to admit I think this “moving in and out” from my home have got smoother then I first had in mind. Maybe because in general it has been my children and their friends that have moved their suitcases in and out, so it’s people I actually know very well 😊.

Now I’m on my own again and have actually been living alone for around a month. I haven’t got or “found” the balance that’s feels best for me yet, but I’m getting closer 😊.

I need to admit I have felt a bit restless and inactive lately, and it has been a little difficult to create new good routines in my life. I’m not sure why I feel and have felt a bit restless, but probably because the life- and living situation has changed again, and I’m going “in and out” from my routines and balance in my life.

And of course this “getting older” process also is influential cause. But I have not quite managed to find my own peace in my everyday life yet.  And I like to have calm, balance, rhythm and routines in my daily life. And I’m not quite there yet…. Maybe I’m a bit a little impatient with myself? I know things takes a bit time sometimes 😊.

I have learned during this around 18 months with a changing life- situation every second and third month that it takes me around 8 to 10 weeks before I’m “there” I want to be and with the balance in my life I feel comfortable with. It doesn’t matter if it’s a living together situation or living on my own,- I’m actually comfortable and have learned to live with the new life situation after around 8- 10 weeks. So you can say I have been a bit “in and out” myself during this 18 months with a changing life- situation, and trying to find my new balance every second or third month 😅. But okay,- that’s life- and I think this time my living alone situation will last a bit longer then 2 or 3 months so I have the chance to find a very good balance in my life too 😊.

I’m not sure if anyone else has it this way? I don’t think the young adult that has been living in my home has felt this “balance” thing in the daily life at the same way as me. And I also think, well at least it looked like that for me, that this young adults found their balance in the daily life very fast, also when they moved into my home 😊. Of course I’m very happy for that, because then at least they felt like “home” and hopefully a bit relaxed with the living together situation 😊.

But I think as older we get a bit more difficult it is for us to “adopt” us into a new life situation, it’s more difficult because we are older, and it takes a bit longer time to feel comfortable and “balanced” in the new life situation. It’s not sure I’m correct. This is just my thoughts and feelings, and also my experiences during the last 18 months.

I’m doing my things, – my job, my freelance work, I knit and I paint too, and I meet my friends now and then as well. So I’m trying my very best to create a balance, my balance in my life. But I still have this restlessness inside me, and Im actually still very inactive in my life even it maybe doesn’t look like that from “the outside”,- and there’s still a couple of more routines I need to try to get a bit better “control” over in my daily life 😊. I’m actually in general a bit more effective then I have been the last month. Hopefully I will be “there” I want to be with my rhythms and routines in my daily life in the middle of May 😅.

Is it just me that is like this? Have this habit and need for having a kind of balance in my daily life, and a kind of rhythm and routines too? And is it just me that actually use over 2 months to “get” the balance in my life I feel comfortable with after some changes in the daily life balance? I hope not 😊. (Anyway I’m who I’m- like to have a kind of balance “here and there ” in my life 😊).

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡. Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

I feel I need to resett my self a bit after some months with “moving in and out” from my home 😊.

Is it just me that like to have a kind of balance in the daily life? I feel I need to resett my self a bit every time someone is moving in or out from my home, because I like to have a kind of balance in my daily life,- both when I’m sharing my home as well as living on my own 😊.

#resett #balanceinlife #gettingolder #Norwegian #livinginspain #lifeis #myblog #mylife #mypost #thedailylife #lifeexperiences #changes #challenges #movingout #dailylife #routines #positivefocus

A new flowering in life 🌹🥀

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

This will probably be my last post for a tiny while that’s contains the subject “menopause” in one or another way 😊. At the same time as there of course will drop up post related to “getting older”,- because that’s actually a part of my life- to get and hopefully be older 😊.

I don’t have to much more to write about at the moment when it comes to the different physical changes and challenges during the menopause.

One thing is that I’m just on the start line into menopause myself, another thing the menopause doesn’t affect me more then I have already been written and told you about. It’s a tiny bit challenging when I feel I’m going to “fall apart” at my walks and actually need to sit down before I can continue my walk. At the same time it’s not happen all the time, it has just happen a few times 😊. And of course it’s a bit uncomfortable to wake up after a “water fall” during the nights. But except from that I can’t complain, or have to much more “exacting” to write about or around when it comes to the physical changes around menopause 😊.

It’s not sure the menopause will be a big challenge with to many changes for me either. I don’t know that yet. But if I remember correctly my puberty was not to bad for me, it felt very “normal”. But I think my parents thought it was a bit difficult now and then 😅. I’m their first child too, and their first teenagers,- so they probably didn’t know what to expect either 😊.

My pregnancies hasn’t been to hard either. So the hormones changing I have been through in my life so fare haven’t been the most difficult and challenging time in my life. But of course there was some challenges as well as changes. But not any big ones. Nothing to “brag” about 😊.

The menopause is also different from woman to woman. Like a pregnancy or giving birth can be.

Some of my friends that’s also going through this “period” ( menopause) in life have some thoughts around “life and dead”, as well as “this is the road to the end,- station” in life. Thoughts about a scary old age, the end in life and about dying 😐.

I haven’t actually thought very much about things like that. Maybe I will get thoughts about “life and dead” and “the end station” in life? I don’t know. At the moment I’m just choose to believe and think that I’m actually starting on a new flowering in my life 🌹🥀. That sounds so much nicer and happier, so much greater and so much more fun to look forward to 😊.

I have also been thinking about how much different experiences, knowledge and adventures in life I have manage to get and different experiences during my 48 year in my life. So why shouldn’t I have the possibility to “squeeze” in a bit more too during the next 20- 30, maybe even 40 years? Okay, – maybe in a bit slower motion and tempo then before, because I’m actually getting older and a bit slower 😅.

But I don’t understand why it should be impossible? 🤔 (in my mind it’s not 😊)

I actually don’t want to stop living now,- I want to do some more out of my life, get some more knowledge in different areas in life as well as get more experiencs too, and hopefully get a bit wiser as well? 😊

I’m meet my new era in my life with the idea that this is a new flowering in my life,- and I really like to look at the “getting older” process like that 🥀🌹.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

I meet my new era in my life with the imagination that it is a new period of flowering in my life 🌹🥀

I know some people in my age think that now the “flower withers” 😌. I choose to believe and look at this “getting older” process with an imagination that I’m meeting a new flowering in my life instead 🌹🥀.

#menopause #midlife #lifeexperiences #changes #challenges #process #midage #gettingolder #Norwegian #positivefocus #lifeisgood #livinginspain #lifeis #newexperiences #newflowringinlife 🌹

Where does the road go in my life now? 🛤💚

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

Like I mention in my last post,- I’m standing on the start line into a new era in my life. At the moment I’m standing and I choose to stand for a tiny little while too, because I just need to do this for myself. I need to feel on my feelings before I start “moving” in one or another direction in my life.

In one way I have some of the same thoughts I had when I was a teenager and was standing on the start line to be a young adult. What to do? Where to go? What can I expect? How do I do this? What do I want? Where do I want “go”? How to “get there”? What will happen there in the future? And so on. Maybe you recognize some of my thoughts from when you was a teenager and on the start line into the young adult life too? 🤔

To be honest,- I think I’m thinking a bit more about this different questions now then I actually did when I was a teenager and on my way to the young adult life. When I was a on my way to be a young adult I lived a bit more in the moment then I’m doing now. And I was also a bit more “what happens happens, it will probably be fun anyway” 😊.

I still think I have a very exciting time in front of me, and I still think I will meet on a lots of joy, fun and happiness,- but I’m probably a bit more conscious of my thoughts, my feelings, and hopefully my choices further too, – than for for example around 30 years ago 😊.

Will I continue be living in Spain? Work as an customer service agent, private teacher and freelance writer? 🎧📝 I have two of my three children here in Spain. At least at the moment,- but I don’t know what they’re plans will be in the future.

Or am I going to move back to Norway? Try to find a job as a teacher or maybe work in the home- nursery or at nursery home? 📚💉 I have one child in Norway, and I really do miss him, at the same time he is living his own life, and I’m not going to be the same part in his life as I was just some few years ago.

Or maybe I’m going to get the opportunity to move to California and squeeze some grapes into wine? 🍇🍷 Or maybe Ireland and visit the leprechaun 🧚‍♂️?

At the moment I don’t know what or where,- and at the moment I actually can’t take any choices either. At the moment I’m in a bit “emotional place” in my life and then it’s not the correct time to make to many and to big choices, elections and decisions in my life and for my future.

What I do know is that I’m going to live in the home I’m living in for a time now. I’m not ready to move anywhere at the moment,- and one of the reasons for that is because it has already been a bit moving in and out from this home during the last 18 months, – even it’s not me that has moved in and out 😊. I just need to have a tiny while of not to much moving “here and there”, just in way to “calm down” 😊.

But I’m actually not sure if I want to continue living in Spain or work as a costumer service agent “for ever”. Or as a private teacher either. But I’m not very tempted to move back to Norway either and work as a teacher or in the home- nursery up there in the North.

At the moment I feel I’m finish with being a teacher and to work in the home nursery, and also as a costumer service agent. But don’t we all have that now and then where you are a bit tired of your job?

And of course,- I’m also a bit “touched” with some emotional feelings because I’m standing on a finish line for one era in my life, as well as a starting line into a new era in my life 😊. So I’m probably not in “the best place” in my life to make any big decisions at the moment either 😊.

I know when we are turning the page on the calendar to August I’m finish working for the department I’m working in. It’s closing down in Norway. But I also know that the company I’m working for have an obligation to try to find an other job to me in the company as long as I have been an employer for more than 6 months,- something I have. But at the same time,- we are living in a corona- situation,- so it’s difficult to tell to much about the future too. I’m can assume what’s in front me until August, but after August I actually have no idea at the moment.

At the moment I have just decided to not do to much of anything, not make to many work- or moving plans or decisions, – just do my work where I’m working, be a private teacher and do my online freelance work, and live in the home I’m living in. Then I see what’s coming up, or what’s happen. I don’t know,- I don’t know if “the road” in the future will be in Spain or Norway or California or maybe another place.

What I do know is that I actually like to work with creative things, and people too,- and I like to see progression in my work too. But my weakness, or strength, is to create, be creative and see a result of my job.  A product.  My dream is really to be able to feed myself on something I make, write, create, paint – or even “squeeze” some grapes into wine? But is something of this actually possible, special because we are living in a corona- situation?

When that’s said,- of course I have seen a lots of great positive progressions in both my work as a teacher as well as in the home nursery 😊. But it’s a different kind of progression.

I want and I like to create, own a product, is a (physical) result of what I do, what I work with.  (ex- paint, knit, write, maybe make wine). But it possible to work and live from something like that? I don’t know.

I do not know what my future will bring me, – but something that contains both joy, happiness and probably a bit new knowledge as well as wisdom, and some changes too.

At the moment I take one tiny step at the time, one from an era that’s over and one into an era that’s started 💚. I need to find my balance in my life before I take to many decisions about my future 😊.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

I’m just going to take one step at the time – one from an era in my life that’s over, and one into the new era in my life 😊.

I don’t know what to future will bring me,- and I don’t know what kind of changes, choices or directions I’m going to do or take 😊. At the moment I just take one step from an era in my life that’s over, and one step at the time into a new era in my life 💚

#changes #directions #choices #lifeis #livinginspain #Norwegian #era #gettingolder #menopause #midlife #erainlife #me #future #questions #thelife #thougths #reflections #positivefocus 💚

I feel on a kind of sadness 💙💙❤

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

I feel on a kind of sadness inside me. Not sadness over new wrinkles or lighter hair, or hormones balance that’s changing. But a kind of sadness that an era in my life is over. The era to be a fulltime mammi. This is over.

I’m still my children’s mammi, I’m always going to be that, but not in the same way I have been for closely 27 years.

I’m actually not sad over the fact that my children are young adults and live on they own either,- but because an era in my life is over, and this time will never come back.

Maybe it sounds strange to feel on sadness, but at the same time still not be sad? Or feel in a kind of grief while not being grieving? But that’s still the way I feel inside me,- because I’m a mammi and because an era in my life is over for always.

I think it’s just someone who have been in the same situation as me that actually will understand what I mean- when it comes to feel on sadness and grief, but not be sad or grieving, because of a era in life is over.

It’s not like I go around and cry all the time, or want my children to move back home again. I’m good in that way,- this is something I feel inside me, in my heart, soul and thoughts, and it’s actually difficult to explain. And I allow myself to feel this without too much interference and influence from outsiders too.

I’m very grateful for all the time, the years, the memories my children and me have together ❤. And I know we will create new memories together too, but in a different way then before 😊.

The sadness is over a time that’s over. An incredible fantastic time together, but also an incredible busy and hard days as a single mammi. I don’t miss the business, at the same time I’m very happy I know I tried my very best to follow up and raise all my three children in different eras in their life ❤.

I hope, think, believe and actually see my children has got a lots of good things and stuffs in their “bagback” from growing up together with me 😊. But of course I also think about all the things I could and should done differently when they was children and growing up. As well as when they was teenagers and on their way to be young adults.

It’s many things I should wish I could done differently, at the same time as I can’t go back to the past and change anything. And I can’t bother myself with thoughts like that either- then I’m going to be “nuts” in my head.

What I can do is to be grateful for being their mammi and for the marvellous young adults they all three are become ❤. And I’m, as I mention, incredibly grateful for all our time and memories together ❤. But I’m also going to allow myself to feel on this sadness and a kind of grief I have inside me for an era in my life that’s over, and use the time I need to use on “this” feelings.

I know this sadness and feeling of grief will change and be different, but I’m using the time I need to “go through” this feeling of sadness and grief inside me in my own way. And like I mention, – it’s difficult to explain how, why and what I’m feeling, it’s just feelings inside me and an era in my life that’s are over together with my children, an era who will never come back, – and that’s the way it is, and that’s the way the life is too 💚.

And now I stand on the starts line to an new era in my life, and at the moment I choose to just stand there a bit too, on the starts line, and feel a bit over emotions and thoughts in relation to a time that is over, before I choose to find any new directions in my life, and start on a new era in my life 💚.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

A photo from a photo- so not the best photo,- but still from one of many best memories in my life as a mammi and together with my three children ❤. (I think this is around 12- 13 years ago) 😊

I stand on the starts line to an new era in my life, and at the moment I choose to just stand there a bit, on the starts line, and feel a bit over emotions and thoughts in relation to a time that is over, before I choose to find any new directions in my life, and start on a new era in my life 💚.

#era #raisingup #growingup #mammi #mammifeelings #gettingolder #Norwegian #feelings #thougths #livinginspain #lifeis #mychildren #happiness #joy #feelinggrateful #feelinglucky #sadness #lifeischanging #lifeexperiences #changes #challenges #positivefocus

Hormone balance changes 🤯😊

Hi ❣ It’s so nice to see you,- like always 😊 I hope all is fine with you 🧡

The hormone balance changes too in my body, but I need to admit I haven’t struggled very much with that one yet, except from this “hot nights” 😊.

My eggs are a bit more “grumpy”, something that makes me a bit more “grumpy” too, now and then. But to be honest, now when I’m alone, living alone, I don’t feel so much this irritating “grumpiness” inside me. Maybe because there’s no around me to be “grumpy” on? 🤔 So I feel my mood is a bit stable, but it’s not sure it is like that 😅. I have no one around me on daily basis to “check out” my mood,- and maybe that’s a good thing at the moment? 😊

My period is “slowing down” too. I still have my period and it’s still coming regular, but it last just a few days now and I’m don’t bleeding so much either anymore.

I have mixed feelings about losing my period, but I had also very mixed feelings when I got my period. So it’s maybe natural to have some mixed feelings around this?

When I got my period I felt so sad that I needed to have this bleeding and pain in my stomach 5 days every month “forever” 😔. But after a while I got use to it. Now I’m in a way looking forward to don’t have this pain in my stomach and the bleeding too, at the same time I have some thoughts about what changes my body will go through to loose my period, and how this can or will affect my “sexual feelings and needs”?

The estrogen is slowing down and then also the sexual feelings and needs can and will slow down too. I actually don’t like that thought.

But if or when this is or should happen, there’s solutions for “keep up the heat in my vagina”. But,- yes, of course I have some thoughts about this,- maybe special because I’m single?

I also had discharge from my vagina before, but I do not see it that much anymore.  And I’m actually not quite sure when it slowed down.  A year ago?  5 years ago?  I have no idea 🤔.  I have not thought much about it either, until now when I think and write about hormones, and various changes in the body, my body.

And sometimes I get such a “milky feeling” in my breast.  As I often got when I was pregnant and when I was breastfeeding.  Like “chest burst”. But it does not last long, and is not a problem or something to complain about.

My bladder has behaved well, I have not had a urinary infection for a long time. But I also drink a little ginger tea occasionally to cleanse my “internal system”.  And the bladder keeps tight, no leaks. I have read about that “leaks” can be a challenge when you get older,- but so fare so good 😊. I think I’m not “old enough” to get any “leaks”, but at the same time I know some women in my age has some challenges with leaks. Hopefully I will manage to “keep tight” “forever” 😊. At least for many years 😊.

I have also felt incredibly bad a couple of times when I have been at my walks. Actually a kind of sick, but still not sick. This hasn’t happened to many times, but I actually needed to sit down and just “put myself together” a bit before I continue my walks.

I can’t actually explain the feeling, it was just physical bad in all my body. I know this “I feel, bad and sick” feeling can drop by too during menopause. Hopefully it would not drop by to many times, because it was not a very good feeling.

I know that there are different solutions and “treatments” if menopause gets to hard and to bad.  There are several natural / alternative treatments, and there are hormone cures.  I know many women are skeptical of hormone regimens because this can trigger different types of cancer.  At the same time, it is possible to go for regular medical examinations for cancer check-ups.

I feel it’s to early for me in the menopause- process to even think about different kinds of treatments, alternative or hormone cures. But I’m actually not a stranger to trying either alternative treatments or hormone cures, should it become challenging, both physically and mentally in menopause.

So fare it is what it is, and not with the biggest challenge actually,- except from the “water falls” some nights, and that couple of times I actually thought I was going to past out on my walks. Because that one was…phu….not good.

But like I have mention before,- I’m just in the beginning of the menopause, and the different menopause changes and challenges are also different from women to women too 😊.

I wish you a great day or evening wherever in the world you are 🧡 Thank you so much for using your time and dropping by my blog today 🧡

See you soon 😊

Just olives as a symbol for “hormones dance” or “hormone balance” and the menopause 🤯😊

I’m just in the beginning of menopause and so fare the hormones are more and less in “balance and stabil” 😊. But if they give me to much troubles I’m not strange of trying different kinds of treatments to get “easier days” 😊.

#menopause #midlife #lifeexperiences #changes #challenges #gettingolder #Norwegian #livinginspain #lifeis #hormonebalance #treatment #thelife #newflowringinlife 🌹